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Tuesday, February 13, 2007

It's a Good Thing I Don't Carry a Gun

If you've been keeping up with my personal life, you know I've been a little stressed lately. The clinic has been very busy, I've had a bunch of admissions, I'm now rounding at three hospitals a day, and I still need to make minyan every morning. Somehow I have to fit everything in and it's a very tight squeeze, and there are days when I feel like my brain is being compressed to fit into an overstuffed bookshelf.

Today was one of those days. Lets see...

Minyan at 5:45-6:35

Home for a bite and a cup of coffee, then

Make rounds at two hospitals between 7 and 9

Make it to clinic hopefully in time to boot up my computer, check my schedule and answer a few emails

See patients non-stop every 15 minutes from 9-12 while simultaneously fielding calls from the emergency room, various hospital floors, and patients who need to be called back before 9 (and what time do I get the message?)

Hop back into my car and drive across town to get to hospital #3 to see that one little old lady who just can't seem to agree on which rehab place she wants to be transferred to

Somehow manage to get to my consulting job by 1pm, maybe eat in the car on the way...

You see how my days have been going?

Back up a bit to hospital #3. I really don't like going there. I have nothing against the place, but it's WAAAY out of my way and it adds about an hour into my day that frankly, I just don't have. The only reason I agreed to go there was to see the little old lady who's been my patient for years.

And no, it's not because I'm such a great doc and don't want to abandon my patient. It's because I don't have the heart to dump her on someone else! Honestly, I wouldn't wish her on my worst enemy. You can tell how much she must appreciate all the effort I go to every day to go and see her (if you said not at all, you are a winner!)

So, as I said. I hate this place. But I made it there today around 12:30ish. And I drive into the Doctor's lot. And...there are no spaces. But.

There is one guy sitting in his car with the engine running. So I back up a little to give him room to pull out. He just sits there. I wave at him. I flash my lights. I make strange arm motions. I drive forward and backwards. Nothing. The time is ticking by. I'm getting late. And did I mention it's snowing heavily now.

I finally drive out of the lot. No sooner do I do so, than he pulls out of the lot and exits. I catch all this in my rear view mirror.

SonofaB***!!! I literally yell that.

I circle back around to the entrance gate. There's a car there already, and the guy gets my spot.

It's a VERY good thing I don't carry a gun.


Ayelet said...

Oh man. I feel for you. That sob deserved to get shot.

Doctor Bean said...

Frak! Your day was a large container of watery stool. I'm really sorry. If we were in the same city I would totally offer to see the old lady in hospital #3 for you. But I'd mismanage her, and she'd die.

(I'm not saying I'd unintentionally mismanage her...)

Hang in there, at least while you're unarmed.

Jameel @ The Muqata said...

PT: I carry a gun all the time...its extremely useful when meeting a manager from abroad. My direct manager from the US came to visit me in Jerusalem and was so shocked to see my handgun...(no one conceals a weapon in Israel)..he said..."I'd rather we discuss your review in PUBLIC" :-)

The funniest though, is when I tried getting "night sights" for my pistol when I was on a business trip to New Mexico. New Mexico is one of those gun-crazy states...and I asked someone in my open space company, "Do you know where I can get night-sights for my Glock 19c?"

About 20 people popped up out of their cubicles waving their hands, "I KNOW!!!" (including the 70 year old grandmother type....)

fudge said...

it's a very good thing i no longer live at home, because now i can do this from a safe distance:

Subway Sally said...

He was saving a spot for a buddy, maybe? That doesn't make it any less annoying, I know.

Subway Sally said...

Now excuse me while I go Google "trogdor." :)

Hila said...


Sorry to hear about the stress as of late. Y'know, carrying a gun around these parts is pretty common. But not of the pistol/handgun variety. Oh no, folks where I'm from love to have rifles and shotguns. In fact, my father has quite the collection of them. I don't know exactly how many he has, but enough to fill several large gun lockers...needless to say, no one messes with us ;-)

PsychoToddler said...

OK, I'm off to Hospital 3 right now. Just in case there are no parking spots, I've put a bazooka in my trunk...

Jessica said...

Did Bean just use the word "frak?" That drives me nuts on BSG...oh wait wrong post.

It's a good thing I don't carry a gun either: I am somewhat excitable. And since I have no idea how to use one, I would probably end up hurting myself my accident when I meant to shoot the jackass blocking the aisle at the store.

Hope your day gets better!

ifuncused said...

You mean you have i.m.s?? (sorry was watching abc.com the other night...forgot the name of the show...Jim something)

PsychoToddler said...

IMS? Is that like IMF? The Impossible Mission Force? Yeah, I'm like that. I have this kit where I can make an exact mold of someone's face, and then like, I can put a mask on, and suddenly I look and sound just like another guy, you know, like even if we have different builds and weights, and also it allows me to speak different languages just by affecting an accent. It's really cool! But that has nothing to do with this post!

ifuncused said...


it's about Jim. abc.com!! Just watched it.

PsychoToddler said...

Sure sounds like it, don't it?